Grey skies with a hint of celebration

This January, I've recognised that grey cloudy skies don't set a good frame for planning and visioning, so I've instead opted to wait for sunnier days to think about what I would like to accomplish the year ahead. Nonetheless, reflecting now and then actually made everything pretty clear for me, as the resolutions came to me instead of me deliberately looking for them. This is a new process (to me) and I am enjoying it. In fact, this seems to fit me pretty well, as I tend to be rather analytical thinking about subjects, but ultimately end up trusting my gut in the big decisions. So, why not start there anyway?

"I said that people never change their lives, that in any case one life was as good as another and that I wasn’t dissatisfied with mine here at all."

Albert Camus

“There is no means of testing which decision is better, because there is no basis for comparison. We live everything as it comes, without warning, like an actor going on cold. And what can life be worth if the first rehearsal for life is life itself? That is why life is always like a sketch. No, "sketch" is not quite a word, because a sketch is an outline of something, the groundwork for a picture, whereas the sketch that is our life is a sketch for nothing, an outline with no picture.”

Milan Kundera

Month overview:

• January has been a demanding month at work, especially after slowing down in December, returning to the highly productive, competitive, goal-oriented environment feels odd. Constantly changing the gear (slow/stress) is wearing me a bit, although I know this is a temporary feeling and things will be overall smoother soon.
• We celebrated our son's fourth anniversary! I keep writing this so that I can finally accept it internally. I am enjoying every step of the way with him, wishing nonetheless I could savor every phase just a tad little bit more... it all unravels so quickly, doesn't it? I 'm glad that I am recording some of these moments here, but mostly, I'm glad that I am paying attention. We bought him rain boots for his birthday, which was the perfect gift (both practical and figurative) for who he is right now, a four-year-old active and curious boy in the rainy winter days.
• I've finally recovered reading time, lost when JP was born. It took me four years, but I have been steadily reading for the pasts two months. This month, I've reread "The unbearable lightness of the being", immediately after I reread The Stranger". Reading the two books together gave them both new meanings to me and deeper understanding of them, it is as they were meant t be read together all along.

Wrapping the learnings:

The secret to a meaningful life may as well be as simple as paying attention. Paying attention to ourselves, to nature, to beauty, to the ones around us. A deep, sincere attention to what really matters is probably the easier way to avoid being stuck on the things that don't matter or that we can't control.

2 comments simple memories